Funeral Etiquette

You're at your former teacher's open casket funeral, and you see no one is looking. Would it be appropriate to decapitate the deceased's head and replace it with a rotten pumpkin? Should I heckle the people making the eulogy? Yell out that they should stop burying the body because I can hear something from inside the casket? Should I turn the casket into a big-ass jack in the box, so that when you touch it, it pops open, shooting the corpse out? These are some real questions, difficult dilemmas we all face when attending a funeral. The purpose of this page is to teach you things you should try not to do at a funeral if possible.